Sunday, March 11, 2007
I'm Ready for Three
I knew it would happen and it has. I don’t know when. It was gradual enough that I can’t pinpoint the exact time.
I now consider myself the mother of three.
Often, I will look at the girls when they are doing something – playing in the living room, reading books in our bed, or eating dinner - and my mind will superimpose another little girl amongst them. It is starting to feel right.
A few months ago, I ran into my good friend, Deb. Deb has one little boy and a similar sense of humor as me. She told me the story of how her best friend recently announced that she was trying to have a third child. Deb said she looked at her and said, “Oh my god, I am not going to be able to be your friend anymore”.
I immediately knew what she was talking about. Neither of us disrespect nor disagree with women who have more than two children. In fact, some of my favorite people do. It’s just that Deb and I are the type of women who can barely keep it together with the kids that we have. We are not the supermoms who can juggle a career and kids and not end up with a nervous tic. The thought of purposely having additional children boggles our mind.
But it occurred to me that I am eventually going to have to stop telling people that my third child was unexpected, unplanned. I don’t know why I feel compelled to give that disclaimer each time someone brings up my pregnancy. It is like I want people to know that I am not, well, that presumptuous. It’s like I want to say “don’t worry. I am not the type of woman who thinks she can be an executive, write a book, support a husband’s budding business AND raise three babies in four years. Believe me, this timing was an accident.”
Perhaps I will get to a place in life where I’m confident about all that I’m juggling and embrace it with pride. But for now, I’ll take that I’m excited about the new baby and worry about the other stuff later.